Sunday, April 12, 2009

Just a Little Frustrated

I haven’t written much lately. All I have felt the last while has been tired and depressed. And what is worse is I have had a sore throat for the last two months, as well. It’s like I can never feel completely myself. It could be because of any number of things. Bruce has had a rough Spring, I’ve had this sore throat, work has been stressful, it’s Lent, and then I’m never sure if it’s just because my kidneys aren’t working up to par. I finally went to my doctor about my throat. I think I need to fire my doctor. He said he wouldn’t take a throat swab because he’d stake his reputation on the fact that it’s not bacterial, it’s just a virus that I haven’t been able to get rid of. So I’m supposed to stay in humid air (I live in Saskatchewan – mmmm… yeah), not cough, not mouth breathe and drink plenty of fluids. But if I’d like to I can come back in two weeks if it hasn’t cleared up by then. What part of I’ve-had-this-sore-throat-for-the-last-two-months did he miss? Does he think two weeks is going to make a difference? Then I mentioned that I’ve been feeling depressed the last couple of weeks and others have noticed. He looks in my file and say, “Oh, yeah. I notice that you mentioned that back in August, too. Well, have a nice day!” And this is supposed to be someone who claims to specialize in mental illnesses?

I think he must be gender specific, because my husband says our doctor always listens to him. But my best friend who also has the same doctor has trouble getting our doctor to listen to her, too.

I’m just a little frustrated. And really tired of having a sore throat. And tired of being tired. And don’t want to admit that there is a very real possibility that because of my PKD that my life is going to have to change.

Well, Bruce is doing much better, anyway. And work is, hopefully, not going to be so stressful. Lent is almost over. Now all I have to do is get rid of this sore throat and someone can come up with a cure for PKD and I’ll be 100% again.